I am my life's God-hunger-heart, part 2



I am

My life's





Nothing is more important

Than my heart's sleepless cry

For God's Compassion-Eye,

His Protection-Feet

And His Forgiveness-Heart.




My Lord, my Lord, my Lord,

From today on

I shall not cry anymore for Your attention;

No, not even for Your Compassion.

I shall cry only for my perfection.




My Lord, my Lord, my Lord,

I know that unless I satisfy You

In Your own Way,

My own satisfaction will always remain

A far cry.




Each time my mind cherishes

A divine thought,

God drops a Compassion-Drop

From His Fountain-Delight-Eye. ```



No more shall I climb up

My hope-mountain-heights.

From now on I shall live

Inside the heart of faith-fountain

And inside the breath of promise-sky.




I sail with perfection-oneness

And satisfaction-peace

Only when I unconditionally love

My Lord Beloved Supreme. ```



God has provided my mind

With a thousand exits

To leave doubt-prison.

Alas, my mind simply does not want

To avail itself

Of this golden opportunity. ```



Spiritual awakening, spiritual feelings

And spiritual self-giving

Must be natural and spontaneous

And can never be forced. ```



The heart's love for God

And the mind's obedience to God

Can and must go together.




My soul's promise

And my heart's satisfaction

Walk, march and run together

Along the same road

To reach the Heart of the Unknowable.




Spirituality is not self-forgetfulness.

Spirituality is self-awareness.

Spirituality is God-fulness.




My Lord Beloved Supreme loves

Even my abysmal abyss Godless days

And my abysmal abyss Godless nights!




O my tormented mind,

I am my lover-heart.

Your days are numbered.

My protector-soul

Is fast approaching my lover-heart.




I always choose God's Needs

Over my needs.

This is the only real way

To make myself and keep myself happy. ```



I never want to count

My heart's aspiration-moments.

I just want to multiply

My life's dedication-hours. ```



My Lord Supreme,

May I always be found

Between my prayer-life-beauty

And my aspiration-heart-fragrance. ```



Ambition kills spirituality.

Aspiration not only revives spirituality

But also energises and immortalises

Spirituality. ```



My life's insecurity

And my heart's satisfaction

Always love to remain

Strangers to each other. ```



May my prayer-heart-power

Silence every day

My desire-mind-sound.




I am so happy

That I now have the capacity

To compel my life to surrender

To my heart's

Secret and sacred God-hunger.




God wants me to be the owner

Of God's Smile-Beauty-Heart.

He does not want me to be the owner

Of my self-pity-tears. ```



O seeker,

You want to know what

Your insecurity, jealousy and impurity

Have done to you?

Your insecurity, jealousy and impurity

Have spread death-seeds

In your inner life of aspiration

And your outer life of dedication. ```



I am divinely proud

Of my mind

Because it is sleeplessly obedient

To God.

I am supremely proud

Of my heart

Because it is breathlessly grateful

To God. ```



My mind thinks that nothing

Has to change.

My heart feels that everything

Has to change.

My soul knows that everything

Is already changed in the inner world

And now is in the process of being changed

In the outer world. ```



I need God's Compassion only,

I need God's Affection only,

I need God's Love only

To be really, divinely

And supremely fulfilled.




Even the very thought of gratitude

Clears my mind,

Purifies my heart

And satisfies my life. ```



Every day

I keep my heart's door open

To impossibility's

Highest and brightest galaxies. ```



My prayer-mind

Is my miracle-power.

My meditation-heart

Is my satisfaction-tower. ```



Each human life

Has only two supreme necessities:

The God-foundation within

And the God-illumination without. ```



Short, shorter and shortest

Is the span of my earthly fame.

Long, longer and longest —

Nay, birthless and deathless —

Is my soul's Heavenly God-oneness-game.




While my soul is in this body,

I must learn the proper way

To love God, serve God and fulfil God

Here on earth and there in Heaven. ```



O my suspicious mind,

I shall not allow you

To destroy the most precious

Faith-fragrance of my heart. ```



True love lives

Inside the life-garden.

True devotion lives

Inside the heart-flower.

True surrender lives

Inside the soul-fragrance. ```



I am not self-indulgent

Only when I choose

God's Compassion-Protection-Feet.


I am always self-indulgent.




I want to be God's

Constant willingness-slave.

God wants me to be

His sleepless, breathless

Oneness and fulness-child.




Every morning

My compassionate Lord Supreme

Tells me the same thing:

"My child, become an aspiration-grower

And not an expectation-collector.

I shall give you everything that I have

And that I am

At My choice Hour." ```



Who can reverse the course of my life-river

So that I may reach the Golden Shore?

God the Compassion-Eye


God the Forgiveness-Heart.




One God-realisation-hero

Absolutely can challenge and destroy

The pride of the world-ignorance-army.




I have definitely two goals:

My very short-term goal is self-giving.

My very long-term goal is God-becoming.




Birthless is the heart-beauty

Of my love

For my Lord Beloved Supreme.

Deathless is the soul-fragrance

Of my surrender

To my Lord Beloved Supreme. ```



God loses faith in us

Only when our enthusiasm-mind

And eagerness-heart

Deliberately start limping. ```



When I was in the desire-world,

I was forced by the undivine forces

To live in an abyss of nothingness.

Now that I am in the aspiration-world,

The divine forces are helping me

Climb up my realisation-pinnacles. ```



God laughs and laughs

When I doubt Him to my heart's content.

God cries and swims in a sea of despair

When I cherish even an iota of doubt

About myself.




God loves me unconditionally

Not because I have a great mind

And not because I have a good heart

But because, unlike human beings,

He simply does not know

And does not want to know

How to do anything else.




It is never too late to seek newness.

It is never too late to achieve fulness.

What we need are

The heart's eagerness-tears

And the mind's enthusiasm-smiles.




May my faith-heart

Run faster than lightning speed

To arrive at my God-destination.




God wants me to simplify

My life-story,

God wants me to purify

My heart-breath,

And God Himself wants to glorify

My soul-song. ```



At least in my case,

I am absolutely sure that

My endless fountain of creativity

Comes from only one Source

And that Source is

The unconditional Compassion-Eye

Of my Beloved Supreme.




Only my heart's streaming tears

Can and shall expedite

My Lord's Compassion-flooded Arrival.


From:Sri Chinmoy,I am my life's God-hunger-heart, part 2, Agni Press, 1994
Sourced from https://srichinmoylibrary.com/ghh_2