If a child who is in kindergarten doubts the knowledge of someone who is completing his Master’s degree, who will be the loser? The one who is getting his Master’s degree will still get his degree, but the one who is doubting will not be able to learn anything from him. In a few years the little one who is doubting will also have the capacity to attend a university and get his degree, but right now, by doubting his older brother he will not gain anything. If he were wise he would try to identify with his brother’s achievement and become totally one with him.
Similarly, doubt often comes to the beginning seeker in the spiritual life. But instead of doubting, if the beginner identifies with someone who is advanced in the spiritual life, if he establishes his oneness with the aspiration of someone who is much more developed, then immediately he gets tremendous confidence and inspiration in his inner life.
When we doubt God we do not gain anything. When we doubt a spiritual Master we do not gain anything. But when we doubt ourselves we lose everything. If we have to doubt, let us doubt God. We can doubt God every second, and He will not lose anything. On the contrary, God, with his infinite Compassion, will forgive us. But when we doubt ourselves, our soul will not forgive us. The moment we start doubting ourselves, all our good qualities will be lost. If we have love or joy it will all be lost. Our self-doubt will destroy our inner possibilities. It is best not to doubt anybody, whether it is God or ourselves. But if we have to make a choice, if we are helpless, then let us doubt God. He will show us Compassion, but we will never be able to forgive ourselves.
Seekers who have spiritual Masters must not doubt themselves. When a seeker who has accepted the spiritual path doubts himself, he is deliberately insulting the capacity of his Master. He accepted the Master because he felt that the Master had capacity. If he starts doubting himself after having accepted a real spiritual Master, that means he is doubting the acceptance, confidence and promise the Master has given him. When a spiritual Master accepts someone as his own disciple, he gives that person the inner promise that one day, at God’s choice Hour, he will take the disciple to God. If the seeker did not have faith in the Master, he should not have accepted the Master as his own. But because he felt and saw something in the Master, because he had confidence that the Master could take him to his goal, he accepted the Master. Once a seeker accepts a Master, his part should be over. He is no longer responsible for reaching the goal. He is responsible only to surrender his life to the Master. If doubt comes, he should surrender it to the Master. If he doubts, he is not only belittling his own inner potentiality, but he is deliberately rejecting his Master’s self-offering. The Master is offering his service totally and unreservedly to help the disciple. If the disciple doubts himself, he will be incapable of receiving the Master’s Love and Concern. In this way he is not only hurting himself but also wasting his Master’s precious Concern and boundless spiritual energy.From:Sri Chinmoy,Two devouring brothers: doubt and ego, Agni Press, 1974
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