Sadness-heart-silence. Madness-mind-eloquence

Return to the table of contents

1.

Supreme!

My solemn promise:
I shall never stand
In Your
Unworthy Presence
With my
Sacred palms together
In supplication.

2.

Supreme!

You will
Never be able
To break
A single smile
Over my
Beautiful face.

3.

Supreme!

I am eagerly waiting
For someone
To replace You,
So that
I can have someone
To swim with me
While I swim
In the sea of tears,
Frustrations
And failures.

4.

Supreme!

You want me
To sacrifice
My life to You.
Never!
You do not value
My life,
To say the least.
Therefore,
I am buying a goat
For sacrifice
To satisfy You,
For I feel
The goat-sacrifice
Will be valued
By You.

5.

Supreme!

How I wish
It would be
A long-forgotten story
That I have touched Your Feet,
Desired and cried
For anything.

6.

Supreme!

I call You
My own:
A mistake
That defies
Correction And
Redemption.

7.

Supreme!

True.
My desires
Were great
In number.
But now
My frustrations
Are a million
Times more.

8.

Supreme!

I do not know how
You justify
Your Name:
"Eternity's
Compassion-Eye
And
Immortality's
Forgiveness-Heart."

9.

Supreme!

To me
The word 'compassion'
Is not applicable
To You.
I have
Luckily ended
My cherished,
Faulty dreams.

10.

Supreme!

Destruction I see
Within, without,
All around.
You are untroubled,
Unconcerned
And what not.

11.

Supreme!

When necessity demands,
Earthly parents
Warn their children.
I took You
As my only Parents.
You deliberately
Did not warn me.
It seems Your dictionary
Does not house
The word 'warning'.
Look at my fate:
Abysmal abyss-sorrows
Have befriended me.

12.

Supreme!

To worship You
Is to be
Intimately familiar
With the sorrows
And pangs
Of my life-tree
With all its branches,
Flowers, leaves
And fruits.

13.

Supreme!

Are You blind?
It seems You see
Only when
I am frustrated
And utterly lost
And I thrust
My anger-finger
In Your
Two uncomely Eyes.

14.

Supreme!

My sole desire
Was to become
The golden dust
Of Your Lotus-Feet.
I am so happy
That it is not too late
To withdraw
My desire totally.

15.

Supreme!

The less
I think of You,
The more I am free
From the
World-disease
Which You
Undoubtedly
And solely are.

16.

Supreme!

In those days,
The moment I touched
Your Feet,
Fears and doubts
Devoured me.
You may not believe —
Fears, doubts, anxieties,
Worries, frustrations,
Unbelief and disbelief
Devoured me
And my life.
Alas, a deplorable,
Despicable experience!
In vain, how hard I try
To delete it
From the tablet
Of my heart.

17.

Supreme!

Hard-hearted
You are.
Stony,
In every sense
Of the term,
You are.
From You,
Nothing shall I get,
Nothing do I desire.
I am self-contained,
Self-sufficient.
Believe it or not,
My self-perfection-life
Plus all-satisfaction-life
Is blossoming
Faster than the fastest.

18.

Supreme!

I was
A slave
To Your Service.
I am now
The master
Of my will.

19.

Supreme!

I shall not give way
To sleep.
My mind-tempest,
My heart-tornado
From now on
I shall
Sleeplessly treasure.
For they are real,
Unlike all Your
Hollow Promises.

20.

Supreme!

If anybody asks me
How to pray to You,
I shall tell him
Immediately,
"Do not walk along
That way.
Be not a fool.
Do not invite
The sea of sorrows."
And I mean it!

21.

Supreme!

If anybody asks me
How to meditate
On You,
I shall tell him
Immediately
To meditate
On frustration
Instead.
It will definitely give
A satisfying result.

22.

Supreme!

I gave up everything
To please You
In Your own Way —
Even the exquisite
Beauty
Of my heart
And the incomparable
Fragrance
Of my soul.

23.

Supreme!

I am so glad
That You
Have defeated me
In forgetting me.
Had it been
The reverse,
The whole world
Would have
Looked down
On poor me.

24.

Supreme!

You always
Talk about
Progress, progress.
Progress.
How is it
That You have
Not even once
Said one nice word
Of appreciation
To me
About my
Most astonishing
Rainbow-series
Of progress?

25.

Supreme!

Knowing fully well
That You would not
Wake deliberately,
I called and called.
Now I do not mind
Even if You enjoy
Your Eternity's
Tranquillity-flooded
Sleep.

26.

Supreme!

I had faith in You
For longer than
The longest time.
I am neither
Begging You
Nor forcing You
To change
The game.
But, I assure You,
If You ever change
The game,
You will not be
Disappointed.

27.

Supreme!

Positions and possessions
I gave You.
I do not have them.
I do not need them either.
My new life
Is my new possession.

28.

Supreme!

I do not want
My case
To be heard anymore.
I am now mightily free
From my supreme
Fascination-illusion-delusion-dilemmas.
I am now in a world
Of a newly acquired life.
I alone
Am my Eternity's all.

29.

Supreme!

Finally,
I am my
Volcano-anger-eruption.
I like it.
I love it.
I treasure it.
I am, at once,
The dreamer
And owner
Of a billion or trillion
Rainbow-dreams.

30.

Supreme!

There was a time
When Your Name
Was my only hope.
Now, my only hope
Is that I can remain
A perfect stranger
To You
Throughout Eternity.

31.

Supreme!

I used to cry.
Weep and sob
At Your Feet.
But those
Malignant diseases
Will never be able
To attack me
Anymore.

32.

Supreme!

You may say
What I am saying
Is absolutely wrong.
You just tell me
If anything is right
In Your creation.

33.

Supreme!

I have emptied
The tear-oceans
Of my heart.
I do not mind at all
If You do not
Come out of
Your dear, sweet
And self-amorous
Comatose sleep.

34.

Supreme!

You want
Your creation
To please You.
I do not know
How You imagine
Your desire
To be fulfilled
As long as You keep
Your creation
Not only
Unconsciously,
But consciously
Weak, helpless
And hopeless.

35.

Supreme!

To repeat
Your Name
Is to welcome
Untold misfortunes.
This is my
Infallible conviction.

36.

Supreme!

They say
That there are
Countless
Undivine children,
But no
Undivine parents.
Alas, how I wish
It could be true
In Your case.

37.

Supreme!

If You continue
To behave like this,
Then for God's sake,
Do not take
Upon Yourself
The name of the
Compassion-flooded
World-Pilot.

38.

Supreme!

To worship You
Is to multiply
One's self-doubts.

39.

Supreme!

The whole world
Understands me,
My poor heart.
Either You do not know
How to understand me
Or You purposely
Do not care.

40.

Supreme!

My hopes
Never thought that
They would find
Their fulfilment
Elsewhere.

41.

Supreme!

I fed You
With my heart's
Nectar-devotion.
I want the world
To continue
To have faith in You.
Therefore,
I am not telling
The world
What You are
Feeding me with.

42.

Supreme!

Both of us knew
Something special:
I knew
How to pray.
You knew
How to spurn.

43.

Supreme!

I begged You
For protection.
I never thought
That You did not
Even know
The meaning
Of protection.

44.

Supreme!

I clasped Your Feet
Most devotedly.
Alas, it was
My delusion-mind
That compelled me
To do so.

45.

Supreme!

Happiness I sought
At Your Feet.
But what have I found
And become?
A tear-stained face.

46.

Supreme!

Openly,
You tell the doctors
To heal the patient.
Secretly,
You tell death
To kill the patient.
Since the beginning
Of Your creation,
You have been
Playing this game.

47.

Supreme!

I desired to become
The dust
Of Your Feet.
I now have become
My greatest victory's
Tallest banner.

48.

Supreme!

Do You have
The capacity
To forgive me?
I do not think
You have.

49.

Supreme!

Do You want me
To forgive You?
For God's sake,
I do not need
And I do not want
To have
That capacity.

50.

Supreme!

It does not matter
Whether You came
To me
Or I came
To You.
We are now
The North Pole
And the South Pole.
This is what
Definitely matters.