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I was a theist of the first water. But now I am converted to a titan atheist. Therefore I am clothed with shame. But alas, shame is ever impotent. No power it has. Once I was a flood of ecstasy. Now I am a main of pangs. O Lord and God, I know my disease is atheism. I have sufficient experience of this disease but no experience in curing it. “My son, depend wholly upon your Will’s help. It alone can transform your malignant present into a benign future like your golden past. My son, to have belief in Me is to dwell in Eldoradoes. To have no belief in Me is to live in a fruitless nowhere.”