My way of praying and meditating

Because of my eldest brother we all came to the Ashram. He came first, when I was one year and three months old. My father expected so much from him. My mother was crying. Then my mother started fasting. She wanted to go and see her son in the Ashram. My father said, “No, I will not allow it.” My mother fasted for a day and a half. Then my father’s heart melted and my mother was able to go to the Ashram and see her eldest son.

Prayers and meditations one can do. One can pray and meditate for hours and days and months and years and years, but jealousy can still enter! In this incarnation, I was no match for my eldest brother in praying and meditating for hours. I did walking, cycling and singing. So much of my meditation took place in the street. I did not sit down. But for the last seven or eight years of my Ashram life, somehow the Mother wanted me to meditate in Sri Aurobindo’s room. Then I had to sit down properly. Before that, I never sat!