The faithful spouses and the unfaithful spouses

There was a man who loved to play golf. One day the wife of the golfer was crying and crying and crying. A neighbour came and said, “Why are you crying?”

The wife said, “This time my husband has left me for good.”

The neighbour was shocked. He said, “What?”

The wife sobbed, “Four times he has left me, but he has always come back. Now this is the fifth time.”

The neighbour reassured her, “He will come back again. If he told you four times that he would leave you, and then he came back, the fifth time also he will come back.”

The wife said, “No, this time he will not come back.”

The neighbour said, “How do you know this?”

She said, “Because this time he has taken his golf clubs. That is a sure sign that he will not come back any more!”

The neighbour said, “If he does not come back tomorrow, let me know.”

The next day the neighbour came and found the wife still crying and crying. All of a sudden she stopped crying. The neighbour asked, “What happened? All of a sudden you stopped crying.”

The wife looked at him and said, “You are so handsome. I want to marry you.”

He said, “I am already married. How am I going to marry you?”

The wife said, “I do not care for my husband at all! Let him not come back. I am praying to God, ‘Let him not come’.”

The golfer’s wife and the neighbour fell in love, and they were both praying to God that the golfer would not return. The neighbour stayed with the golfer’s wife and they were both extremely happy. This went on for about a week. The neighbour’s wife did not know that her husband was just next door. He had told her that he was going out of town on business for a week. The wife was absolutely sure that he was going away for a week, and then he would come back. She did not suspect him at all.

One week passed, and the neighbour’s wife started worrying that something had happened to her husband. Next door, the golfer had not returned, so the golfer’s wife and the neighbour were very happy together. They were absolutely in love.

After three weeks, the golfer came back and discovered the neighbour living in his house. He immediately started beating up the man. He said, “What right do you have to live in my house?” Then he kicked the neighbour out onto the street.

The golfer’s wife said to her husband, “I do not want to remain with you any longer. I love this man and I want to marry him.”

The poor golfer said, “Can this be my wife?”

In the meantime the neighbour had no choice but to return home. His wife heard the whole story. She told him, “You are such a rogue! I will not take you back.”

So the unfortunate neighbour could not marry the golfer’s wife because her husband had badly thrashed him and kicked him out. Then his own wife did not accept him back because he was so undivine and unfaithful. So he had lost on both sides: he lost his wife, and he lost his lover. Meanwhile, the wife of the golfer did not want to remain with her husband any more. She said, “No, I love our neighbour far more than I love you.”

Her husband said, “You are so unfaithful! It is much better for me to remain a bachelor. If your love is for our neighbour, then I do not need you. I do not want to be with you any more. In fact, I do not need marriage any more. All women are like you.”

The two couples went to a judge to help them resolve their situation. The judge said, “What is all this about?”

The golfer explained that he did not want to keep his wife because she was so unfaithful. The neighbour’s wife explained that she did not want to take her husband back because he was unfaithful to her.

The judge said, “This matter is so easy to settle.” He asked the wife of the golfer, “Do you still love your neighbour most?”

She said, “Yes, yes, I love him so much.”

Then the judge asked the neighbour, “Do you still love the wife of the golfer?”

The neighbour said, “Yes, I still love her.”

The judge said, “Then you two should get married.” Then the judge turned to the neighbour’s wife and asked her, “Will you not be happy to have a faithful husband?”

She said, “Yes, I need a faithful husband.”

The judge asked the golfer, “Will you not be happy to have a faithful wife?”

The golfer said, “Yes, that is why I do not want to remain married to my wife any more — because she has been unfaithful.”

The judge continued, “Then can you not marry your neighbour’s wife? She is faithful and she wants a faithful husband. You are faithful and you want a faithful wife. Such being the case, can you not switch? You be faithful to your new wife and your former wife can be faithful to her new husband. At least with one person you should be faithful.”

The golfer and the neighbour’s wife saw the wisdom of the judge’s suggestion. They said, “Let us get married.”

So the unfaithful pair got married, and the faithful pair got married. This is how the judge wisely solved the problem.