When we see and feel that Somebody else is doing it

Sri Chinmoy: When we see and feel that Somebody else is doing it, then we do not have to worry at all because we are not responsible. If Somebody is doing something in and through me, it is up to Him to accept success and failure.

When I was working at the Indian Consulate, I never dreamt of writing thousands and thousands of poems and songs. At that time, I wrote a poem on B.K. Nehru, then Indian Ambassador in Washington. I think he was the nephew of Jawaharlal Nehru. At his farewell party I read out the poem. I also read out a poem at the farewell party for B.N. Chakravarty, the Indian Ambassador to the United Nations. He was Bengali. I did the same for Lakhan Mehrotra. So three of my poems I read out at their farewell parties, but I never thought I would write thousands of poems.

Once the Asia Society came to the Indian Consulate to find somebody who could sing Bengali songs. As I am a jack of all trades and master of none, I agreed to sing. They asked me to sing three songs. For each song they gave me ten dollars. That was very good. I am just telling how my literary and musical career started blossoming.

Another time the Consul General S.K. Roy asked me to give a talk on Hinduism at a synagogue in Long Island. The organisers wanted S.K. Roy to preside over the event. S.K. Roy asked, "Who is giving the talk?" They were so happy to tell him that Ananda Mohan was going to give the talk. When S.K. Roy heard that, he said, "No, I am sending Ghose." I was a junior clerk, and Ananda Mohan was in the Information Section. But I was asked to go and give the talk. So I gave the talk, and the Consul General was pleased.

Ananda Mohan was an excellent lecturer on Hinduism and Indian culture. He wrote Indira Gandhi's biography. I had such admiration for him. He worked in the Information Section, and I was nobody, absolutely nobody. Unfortunately, he was not in the good graces of S.K. Roy. Even though I was still quite young, S.K. Roy wanted me to give the talk on Hinduism. I had never thought of giving a talk on Hinduism, but I was asked to go there, and they liked it. They gave me one hundred and ten dollars, so I was making progress.

I was terribly afraid of S.K. Roy. Once when I was near the elevator, the elevator door opened up, and I ran away when I saw S.K. Roy inside. He came out of the elevator screaming, "Ghose! Ghose! Am I a tiger? Am I a snake? You must come in!"

S.K. Roy was so kind to me. Once he asked me if I knew Dilip Kumar Roy, the great Indian singer who was known as the golden voice. Perhaps you have heard his name. He was the dearest disciple of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother. When I was only thirteen or fourteen years old, I basked in the sunshine of Dilip Roy's compassion and love. We lived on the same street, and once I gave him two hundred poems of mine. He corrected them and appreciated them. I also wrote something about his father, a great poet and revolutionary, so he was full of affection for me.

When S.K. Roy asked me if I knew him, I said, "Dilip Roy? Yes." Then I told him all about my closest connection. I told him that when I came here, I wrote a letter to Dilip Roy, who opened up his own ashram. I told S.K. Roy all my experiences with him from my adolescent years. S.K. Roy was so happy because he and Dilip Roy were very close friends.