Question: You say that if we have dynamism in patience, that implies a destructive power. How should we deal with imperfection in ourselves that keeps recurring? If we want to destroy it with dynamism, is that bad? On the other hand, will God's Justice not have a destructive power?Sri Chinmoy: God’s Justice is destructive for our physical, our vital or our mind, not for our soul. Again, God says that it is He Himself who is having an experience. He had the experience of His Patience. Now He is having another experience with His Justice.
You are saying that you want to destroy your imperfections. But destruction is not the answer. Inside patience is light. Light will illumine all our bad qualities. Our ‘bad qualities’ means our darkness. Darkness can only be conquered by light. A room may be full of darkness for years. Then an electrician comes and in a few minutes he brings light into the room. Similarly, we have to bring light into all our imperfections. When we get illumination, all our insecurity, jealousy, impurity, impatience — everything — will be illumined. Light is the answer. The sooner we bring light into our system from Above or bring light to the fore from within the better for us. Otherwise, at any moment we can make mistakes. Light does not make any mistake. It is because we do not have light in boundless measure that we make mistakes. Each mistake is nothing short of darkness. When darkness expresses itself, it becomes a mistake.
Light is the answer. Why should we compel God to use His iron rod? When He was using His Compassion-Eye, what was wrong with us? Why did we not change our nature? If we love God, then we have to feel that God’s Tears are infinitely more powerful than God’s Smiles. If we are weak, then when God smiles at us, either we feel that we did not make any mistake or that God has forgiven us. This is how we deceive ourselves. But God’s Tears offer us another way. If we see tears flowing in God’s Eyes because of our mistake, how can we bear to see His Heart bleeding? If we see that somebody’s heart is bleeding, will we not give our life to make that person happy? And do we not love God infinitely more than we love any human being? So God’s Tears are infinitely more powerful than God’s Smiles. If we want to transform our nature, God’s Tears will be of real help to us.
True, God’s Smiles encourage us, but at the same time, we may misinterpret God’s Smiles. We may go on and on making the same mistakes and still God may give us a Smile. Inside His Smile, God may be suffering, but we take it as encouragement. In one sense, God also takes it as encouragement because He hopes that if He gives us a broad Smile, we will not make the same mistake again. But unfortunately, it does not work.
If you really love God and if you see that He is shedding bitter tears, He is lamenting, He is suffering, then you will immediately transform your life. Today in the prayer I offered before cycling, I said:
My Absolute Lord Supreme,
When I secretly and deliberately hide
Inside my mind-jungle,
Only my God the Father and God the Mother
Search for me
Full of worries and full of anxieties.
If you are good people, then when you do something wrong, you will not hide from God. You will come and stand before Him and say, “I have done something wrong. Now please forgive me. Please illumine me.”