1.

My Lord,
I am utterly lost.

My child,
You and I are in the same boat.

2.

It took my Lord Compassionate Supreme
A whole day to teach me how to laugh,
A full month to teach me how to giggle,
And an unending 365 days to teach me how to chuckle.

Then God said to me,
"My child, you may be a very slow learner,
But now you have become a perfect professor."

3.

My Lord,
Is there any way
I can make You laugh?

Just ask Me to trust you.

4.

My Lord,
How is it possible for You
To remain always happy?

My child,
Unlike you, I talk to Myself,
And I listen to Myself.

5.

My Lord,
Are You aware
Of the bad things
That I do?

My child,
No, I am not aware,
And I don't want to be.

My Lord, why?

Just because
You don't care to know
How many good things I do.

6.

My Lord,
Do tell me
When You are really
Pleased with me.

My child,
I am really pleased with you
Only when you hate Me.

My Lord,
How?
How can it be true?

How, my child?
That is the only time
That you think of Me.

7.

My Lord,
How can I become perfect?

My child,
You can become perfect
Just by teaching Me
For 99 years and 365 days
All that you have learnt.
From your ignorance-teacher.

8.

My Lord,
Have You ever
Told me a lie?

Many, many times.

Why, my Lord, why?

Just to be even with you,
My child.
As you know,
I never accept defeat
From anybody.

9.

My Lord,
Will You help me
To be as great as You are?

No.
I can't allow you
To be as great as I am.

Why?

My ego-head will be crippled.

10.

My Lord,
Will You allow me
To be as good as You are?

Certainly.
Do you know why,
My child?

Why, my Lord?

Because,
If you become as good as I am,
Then I will be able
To enjoy My retirement,
Which I so desperately need.

11.

My Lord,
Do you enjoy it
When I quarrel with You
Unnecessarily and foolishly?

My child,
Let Me add —
And unpardonably as well.
Am I correct,
My son?

My Lord,
Perhaps You are.
My Lord, tell me,
Why do You allow me
To indulge
In quarrelling with You?

My child,
If I do not allow you
To empty
Your overflowing poison-ocean into Me,
Then who will and who can?

12.

My Lord,
People say that I am
Extremely beautiful.
Do You agree with them?

No, never!

My Lord,
Why are You so cruel to me?

Because you do not
Give any credit
To the Source.

Who is the Source
And what has the Source
Done for me?

I am the Source
And I tell you once and for all,
The beauty that you have
Is a loan from Me.
At any moment
I can compel you
To return it.
My child,
I can never understand
How a beggar-borrower
Can ever be happy and proud.

13.

My Lord,
I wonder how You answer
All my questions
So easily and perfectly.

My child,
Don't forget that I am
A little bit older than you.

My Lord,
That means when I equal
You in age,
I shall be able
To answer all Your questions.

No.
I shall always remain
Older than you.

14.

My Lord,
What shall I do
With my mind?
Do give me some advice.

I do not want you
To live without a mind.
Again, with a mind either.

15.

My Lord,
I am always afraid of You.
Are You ever afraid of me?

Of course, of course.
I am always afraid
Of your tearful eyes.

16.

My Lord,
What are You doing now?

I am arguing with Myself.

My Lord,
What are You arguing about?

My child,
I want to know for sure
Whether I am a failure
Or you are a failure.
Also, I want to know
If both of us are failures.

My Lord,
You may be a failure,
But I am not, never.

17.

My Lord,
They tell me that
When everything else fails,
Try prayers.
My Lord,
Is it true?

No, it is not.
When everything else fails,
Start blaming Me.

My Lord, why?

Why?
Because My world-happiness-machine
Is always out of order.

18.

My Lord,
If I give You
My mind's precious hallucinations,
What will You
Give me in return?

My child,
I shall immediately give you
My Heart's spacious Reality.

19.

My Lord,
Do You want to know from me
Why I am so fond
Of my ego?
I am so fond of my ego
Because my ego is the only thing
That I can always depend on.
It always claims me.
Vice versa.

20.

My Lord,
Now that my mind
Is in abysmal abyss,
What shall I do?

Tell your mind
That there is only one direction left —
Up.

21.

My Lord,
Please tell me if I am alive.

My child,
Resurrect Me first.

22.

My Lord,
Even when I do not
Have the right questions,
How do You
Have the right answers?

My child,
At least one of us
Has to be right.

23.

My Lord,
When I do not allow You
To be inside my heart,
Where do You go?

My child,
No particular place.
I become a homeless vagabond,
Plus a sonless Father.

24.

My Lord,
I forget so many things so often.
Do You ever forget anything?

My child,
You are very rich,
Specially in your mental world.
I am not as rich as you are.
Therefore, you can afford to forget.
Poor as I am,
I cannot afford to forget.

25.

My Lord,
I am so grateful to You,
For You have given me so much.

My child,
I want to remain satisfied
With your gratitude-heart.
Don't ask Me for anything more.
Who knows?
This time I may disappoint you.

26.

My Lord,
How can I shut up my mouth?

My child,
Just open up your heart.
Your mouth will automatically
Be sealed.

27.

My Lord,
I have discovered happiness
By deceiving myself.
How have You discovered
Your happiness?

My child,
I have not yet discovered happiness.
Perhaps you can teach Me.
Who knows, your way may be
The only way for Me to be happy.