Question: How can we surrender our anxiety for liberation?Sri Chinmoy: First of all, you are using the wrong word: anxiety. In the spiritual world, there is no anxiety. When you are full of anxiety, it means you are disturbed and perturbed. Anxiety comes when you have done something wrong or somebody else has done something wrong or when people misunderstand you. But when it is a matter of liberation, the word you have to use is 'eagerness'. Some people are eager to get liberation; again, some people are overeager. They say, "I have to reach the goal right now." It is like crying to become a millionaire overnight. These people are eager to realise God overnight, in ten minutes or in ten seconds, in the time it takes to prepare instant coffee.
Now, how can you control your eagerness? Eagerness as such is not bad; it is good. But eagerness is often followed by impatience. You should be eager to realise God today. When today has ended, if you have not realised God, then tomorrow you should again be eager to realise God. The same eagerness you should maintain tomorrow also and the next day and so on. This way, one day you will see that you have touched the goal. But if you become impatient, then you are limiting the strength of your aspiration. Your impatience will pinch you like a monkey or it will be like a tiger inside you that will be devouring you.
Impatience makes you feel that everything can be had for the asking, but it is not alike that. You have to pray for it. When you pray for it, then only you will be satisfied. If you work for something and then get the results, you are satisfied. Otherwise, you will not relish the results. The father has money, but if he gives all the money to his child, the child will squander it; he will not value it. But if the child works and then the father gives him money, then the child gets joy.
Eagerness should be maintained, but impatience should not be allowed to enter. In the spiritual life, when you want to realise God, eagerness is extremely good, but we have no right to the date. God has His own Hour and that is the time for you to realise Him. Pray to Him to grant you realisation at His choice Hour. Then you can try to accelerate your progress. At that time if He has decided that He will give you realisation in ten incarnations, He may change His plan and give it to you in forty years. But by pushing and pulling God you will not be able to get realisation today; by hook or by crook you will not get it. But if you pray, "O God, give me liberation, give me realisation at Your choice Hour," then God will be so pleased He will expedite your realisation.
There are many people on earth who say, "O God, I am in Your eternal Time. Let me take rest. I will live an ordinary life. You give me illumination in Your own time." But this is the wrong attitude. You have to work very hard every second, twenty-four hours a day, for liberation through your dedicated service, through your prayer, through your entire spiritual life. Then you surrender to God's Will. You say, "God, at Your choice Hour give me liberation." After doing everything that you can, you will see that realisation does not depend on your working very hard. It entirely depends on God's Grace. But He will give you Grace, He will show you infinite Compassion only when He feels that you have done your best, you have played your role. When you have played your role, He will play His role. He will give you what you wanted and infinitely more.