42

“My brother has become close, quite close, to the Master, but I definitely know that if I follow my brother’s path, I can easily surpass him. In him I always notice a kind of over-enthusiastic fanaticism. He is carried away by all the outer world’s fantasy and by the inner world’s most complicated and unexplainable fantasy.” This is what he thought.

But after following his brother’s path for a few months, he felt differently. “Alas, I have tried in vain to outshine my brother with my dedicated service, but my brother wants to please the Master in his own way. He feels that is the only way to become happy, whereas I feel that if my happiness has to depend on somebody else’s compassion, pity or even love, then I don’t need that person. I want to remain my own boss, self-sufficient.” Also, he felt that the disciples were all fond of his brother and his brother’s craziness, but they were not fond of his own inner maturity.