The Master's scolding

"My daughter, why do you look so sad today? You should be happy and proud that I have asked you to come to my ashram to work for me."

"I am sorry, Master. I cannot help thinking of your scolding yesterday."

"Yesterday I scolded you mercilessly, true, but today I am showing you my infinite Love and Affection. Why do you always have to think of my scoldings?"

"I don't know, Master."

"Do you feel resentful?"

"Master, is it a feeling of resentment or a feeling of helplessness?"

"In this case, my daughter, it is not a feeling of helplessness; it is an inner revolt."

"What should I do so that I won't revolt in this way, Master?"

"You have to feel that everything I say is absolutely correct, absolutely necessary. No matter what I say, even if I do it in a joking manner, it is for the good of my disciples. If you become annoyed or embarrassed by something I say, then you will not receive my Light."

"Sometimes I feel really useless and hopeless when you point out so clearly my limitations and weaknesses."

"At that time, my child, do not feel depressed or disheartened. Instead, feel that here is someone who really loves you, who has unconditional Concern for you."

"Do you ever feel disheartened when I make the same mistakes over and over?"

"If I had been an ordinary human being, I would have given up my efforts with you long ago. I would have said, 'She is useless, hopeless. To transform her nature is an impossible task.' But the divine in me will never take this attitude. When I deal with my spiritual children, it is my unconditional Love, Concern and Compassion that are operating. No matter what you have done, no matter what you do, I will always continue to show you my infinite Concern."

"Master, I am sorry that I don't deserve it."

"Everything is unconditional, my child. As I have been asking you to be unconditional and unreserved in your love, devotion and surrender, so also I am being unconditional with you. I do not only preach: I also practise. Again and again I will come to you and offer you my unconditional guidance in the hope that gradually, gradually you will improve."

"Am I improving, Master? Will I improve?"

"Yesterday I talked to you for an hour and a half. That means that I feel you can receive my Light and Wisdom. You should be happy and proud that I spent so much time with you. If I had felt that your case was hopeless, then I would simply have given up the fight. Your problem is that you don't feel confident that you can transcend your weaknesses. But if you feel me in your heart at all times, then you will have confidence in yourself."

"Master, there is something else I should tell you. Sometimes I feel so ashamed of my weaknesses.

"Daughter, if I am your Supreme Lord, your Beloved Supreme, which is what you always tell me, then you should not feel that you have to hide anything from me. There is nothing you should try to keep from me, nothing in your nature that you have to be ashamed of. If you know that I am your dearest Lord, then only feel our oneness, our inseparable oneness. The creation does not try to hide from the Creator. If you have a lump of clay and you offer it to be moulded, then it will no longer remain unformed, dirty, impure. Similarly, if you offer me your ignorance, then I can transform it. My daughter, don't you feel how lovingly and divinely I have been guiding, moulding and shaping you?"

The Master paused. "How great is your surrender to me, my child? If I asked you to go and work somewhere else, would you do the work as cheerfully as when you are here with me? When I ask you to do something, do you do it willingly, cheerfully, unconditionally?"

"Master, I confess that my surrender is not very strong. Usually for much of the day I am not with you and therefore I don't feel that I am an integral part of your life."

"Daughter, is there one day when I don't see you or speak to you on the phone? In so many ways I am making you close to me. By asking you to do all kinds of selfless service for me, I am giving you the opportunity to become part and parcel of my life. When you work for me, it is so easy to be in my consciousness, to feel me in your heart. The important thing is not how much you are with me physically, but how much you hold me in your heart. My sister, who lives thousands of miles away, is so dear to me. And I am everything to her: I am her whole world. But I can speak to her on the phone only two or three times a month. Now, do you think she is not dearest to me?"

"Master, I shouldn't think so much about other disciples who are with you more than I am."

"My dearest daughter, I know what is best for you, what will enable you to make the fastest progress. I do what is right for each disciple of mine."

"Even when I am with you, Master, often I am painfully aware of my limitations that you have pointed out."

"Why do you allow this kind of mental headache to torture you? How much faith do you have in me? Can you not feel that I am doing and will do everything for you? You should be happy that there is a person who really loves you unconditionally and unreservedly. Come, let me bless you, my child."

The Master blessed the disciple. "Do you believe what I am saying?"

"I believe it."

"Do you feel it?"

"I feel it Master."

"Then grow into it, my child. Believe that I am doing everything for you. Feel me in your heart at all times. Increase your love for me. Make your surrender cheerful, unconditional. You will be my true joy, my highest pride. And you will be eternally secure, happy and fulfilled."

Sri Chinmoy, A galaxy of saints.First published by Agni Press in 1974.

This is the 182nd book that Sri Chinmoy has written since he came to the West, in 1964.

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by Sri Chinmoy
From the book A galaxy of saints, made available to share under a Creative Commons license

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