Self-examination

University of Connecticut at Storrs; Storrs, Connecticut, USA St. Thomas Aquinas Chapel 14 January 1974

Dear seekers of the infinite Truth, just because we are all seekers we are all in God’s Boat. God’s Boat will carry us to our Destined Goal. Today I wish to give a short talk on self-examination. Most of us here are students. To be precise, all of us are students. Some of us are studying at the University, while others are studying in the outer world or in the inner world. We work very hard to pass our examinations. Our teachers and professors work very hard to be impartial.

When the human teacher wants to examine us, very often his pride pleads with him. It wants to examine us on the teacher’s behalf. When God, the divine Teacher, wants to examine us, His Compassion pleads with Him. It wants to examine us on God’s behalf. The human teacher gladly agrees to the proposal made by his pride. The divine Teacher immediately agrees to the proposal offered by His Compassion.

When the human teacher examines us, we either pass or fail the examination. But when the divine Teacher examines us, we never fail. Why? We never fail because the divine Teacher is at once our examiner and our private tutor. He privately teaches us what He is going to ask us in His examination. Naturally we never fail. First He teaches us devotedly, constantly and unconditionally. Then He openly examines us, and we all pass His examination without any difficulty.

Self-examination and deception are total strangers. They are constantly at daggers drawn. Deception hates self-examination. Self-examination is fond of perfection, and perfection is proud of self-examination. Deception runs backward. Self-examination runs forward to its goal of perfection. At the end of the backward journey, evil shakes hands with deception. And at the end of the forward journey, God, the Supreme Pilot, garlands self-examination.

Self-examination is our aspiration for the higher world and the inner world. The higher world is immortal Light. The inner world is infinite Peace. Light shows us the face of Truth and then makes us the body of Truth. Peace makes us the body of Truth and then shows us the face of Truth. Light says to Peace, “Sister, I need your Length. What you have and what you are is Infinity’s Length.” Peace immediately tells Light, “Brother, my Length is equally yours. What you have and what you are is Transcendental Height. I need your Light and your Height.” The immortal Light says, “My sister, take it. My Light and my Height are equally yours.”

Unlike us, God examines Himself constantly. We are reluctant to examine ourselves, but God is fond of examining Himself at every moment. He examines Himself in order to see whether His infinite Compassion is operating most effectively in the heart of mankind. And unlike us, God is fond of perfecting Himself at every moment. He feels that He is perfect only when we can offer Him a soulful smile. We pray to God for countless things, but He inwardly prays to us for only one thing: a smile, a soulful smile.

Self-discovery and God-discovery are one and the same thing, but they usually work in two specific ways. In God-discovery, we see the infinite Infinity crying in the heart of the finite. In self-discovery, we see the finite smiling through the soul of the Infinite.

Self-examination leads us to self-control. Self-control leads us to self-mastery. Self-mastery is the denial of ignorance-sea and the affirmation of illumination-sky. Self-examination is our journey’s start. Our first Goal is self-discovery. Our second Goal is God-revelation. Our third and last Goal is God-manifestation. God-discovery or God-realisation, God-revelation and God-manifestation: these are the three rungs in the ladder of our spiritual evolution. Early in the morning, Mother Earth offers God-realisation to Father Heaven as her first gift. At noon, Mother Earth offers God-revelation to Father Heaven as her second gift. And in the evening, Mother Earth offers God-manifestation to Father Heaven as her third and ultimate gift.

All seekers of the Transcendental are receiving Truth, Peace, Light and Bliss according to their capacity and receptivity. Everyone starts his spiritual journey as a beginner-seeker. When a beginner-seeker examines his body, he discovers a stupid donkey. When he examines his vital, he discovers a mad elephant. When he examines his mind, he discovers a restless and mischievous monkey. And when he examines his heart, he discovers a feeble ant. His sincerity sees and feels it. But at the end of his journey’s close, his sincerity makes him see and feel something else. He examines his body and discovers a sea of Purity. He examines his vital and discovers a sea of divine Power. He examines his mind and discovers a sea of infinite Peace. He examines his heart and discovers an infinite expanse of Light and Delight.