Question: Sometimes I feel like going out for a run, but something inside holds me back. It's like an inner battle going on. Yet when I do run I feel very happy.Sri Chinmoy: We are composed of the body, the vital, the mind, the heart and the soul. These parts are members of the same family. They are supposed to go together. The eldest brother is the soul. Then comes the heart, then the mind, then the vital, then the body. If they stand in line, one after the other, then the soul will be able to pull them — like a string. If they are lined up in this way, then it will be very easy for the soul to pull them along.
Unfortunately, it does not happen this way. The soul will go first, but the heart will not be there. Then with greatest difficulty, the soul will run to find where the heart is hiding. Meanwhile, the mind becomes rebellious and revolts. It says, "No, I won't go behind you." Then the vital becomes absolutely stubborn. It says, "No, I am not going at all!"
What will the body do? The poor body wants to go, but it is not getting any inspiration because the vital and mind are not supporting it. The body wants to go with the soul, so that the outer running will go along with the inner running. But the body sees that the mind does not want to go, the vital does not want to go and the heart does not want to go. Then the body starts doubting if it is doing the right thing. The body says, "If I am doing the right thing in following the soul, then how is it that the heart and the mind, my elder brothers, are not doing it? Perhaps I am not doing the right thing. Perhaps the soul is not telling me the right thing."
If the soul says to pray and meditate, it will be very easy for the body to believe. That is because as soon as we say 'soul', we think of God. We think that inside the soul is God, or that inside God is the soul; the soul and God go together. God has given the message of the inner and outer running to the soul. Now the soul is trying to bring the younger members — the heart, mind, vital and body — along with it. But when the heart, mind and vital do not join with the soul, then suspicion starts in the physical consciousness.
Early in the morning, first the heart says, "Why go out and run? It is time to pray and meditate." Then, after a few minutes, this same heart will have no more energy left to pray and meditate. It will say, "Let me go back to sleep." Then the mind is such a rogue! Whenever the heart is not in tune with the soul, at that time the mind listens to the heart and fully supports the heart. When this kind of separation starts, it is extremely difficult for the body to achieve anything here on earth, on the physical plane.