Question: After we pray and offer it to you, is there anything we can do on the outer plane to create more harmony in a situation where we are in charge of something when there has been gossip or criticism?Sri Chinmoy: First of all, you have to make yourself more humble than a blade of grass. The second thing is to feel that you are not indispensable for this project. The responsibility for its success or progress depends on God. The feeling that you are indispensable has to go, and you have to feel that if you do not succeed, in no way will I blame you or delay your God-realisation — far from it! Anything that you are involved in, you will try your best, but then you have to say, “This much I can do. O God, give me more Grace so that I can do better.” The easiest way to create harmony is to discard the feeling of supremacy. As long as supremacy looms large, there is no harmony. Today, America is suffering because of its feeling of supremacy. When there is a feeling of supremacy, you can forget about harmony.
Another way to create harmony is to offer others appreciation. If someone has done something wrong, just say to that person, “If I had been in your position, I would have done something infinitely worse.” This is not false modesty; this is the way you can lift up the other person. You know for sure that you are not going to do such a stupid thing or bad thing. But to make that person happy, you will say, “In your circumstances, I would have done something infinitely worse.” By saying this, you will have already raised his standard high. He will be getting joy by thinking that he is not alone in making the mistake. Then you can play a trick. You can say, “I do not think I have the capacity to do it any better, but I strongly feel that you have the capacity to do it better, and you will succeed.” In a clever way you will be turning a sinner into a saint. You can call it cleverness or wisdom. I call it wisdom. You are using wisdom to change the life of someone and help him turn over a new leaf. You will never say that he is bad. If you say that he is bad, then you are creating one more enemy in your life. If you want to help anybody, if you want to raise someone up, there are two ways. One way is to offer advice, but who is going to listen to your advice? The other way, if you really want to lift someone up, is to bend. If you want to lift someone on your shoulders, do you keep your body erect? No, you bend. When you bend, you lower your own height so that the other person can climb on top of you. When he is high on your shoulders, in terms of height he is higher than your head, but whom will people appreciate? People will appreciate you because it is you who lifted him up. Once you lift him, you get the credit because you are so strong.