Fate can be changed1For many days I have made it a point to meditate on your ailment to bring down light. I leave the results at the Feet of my Absolute Lord Supreme. I have not missed one day, but the results you are not yet getting. In the Bhagavad-Gita, our Song Celestial, Lord Krishna said that we have the right to pray, but we have no right to the fruits of our prayer. The fruits you are not yet getting, but my prayer I do continue.
I have not given up, because I never take anything as a hopeless case. We feel that fate can be changed. There is nothing impossible in God’s creation. “Impossibility” is found only in the dictionary, and in the mind. Once we can go beyond the domain of the mind, there is no such thing as impossibility. With regard to your ailment, I still keep the same hope. More than that, it is determination, or will-power. As far as the regularity of my prayers for you is concerned, I have not failed even once. I do hope that something will happen.
There are two types of surrender. One type is the surrender of a lazy man. He has already given up. His surrender is only to say, “Let Thy Will be done.” He does nothing to make any improvement. Another type of surrender is to work very, very hard for improvement, for progress. If someone works very hard for his success and progress, even if success does not take place, in the inner world he gets real Blessings from Above.
One individual gives up; another individual continues and continues. There may be no success as yet, but the Inner Pilot is truly pleased with the one who has not given up. The first individual may declare, “I have not given up,” but is he consciously doing anything to meet his objective? Sometimes we do not give up, but we only keep a kind of wishful thinking that some improvement will take place. But on a regular basis if we pay attention to what we actually need in our life, then I feel that, even though God may not fulfil our desire in our own way, He has His own Plan. In His own Way He can accomplish in and through us something most special.
Let us say that I want a mango, my favourite fruit. For some reason, although the mango is my most favourite fruit, God feels that some other fruit will be good for me. Again, perhaps it is not that some other fruit will be good for me — God is examining me to see how much surrender I have made to His Will. I can say that, if a mango comes for me, well and good; in this case I am not making any effort. Again, if I sincerely strive for a mango, and God gives me another fruit, I may not be satisfied, but somehow in the inner world I will be much more fulfilled. When I dive deep within, I will feel that God did not give me the mango, but He examined me to see whether I was ready to accept what He wanted to give me, happily and cheerfully. If we get something unexpected from God, and if we can accept it happily and cheerfully, then He does something special in and through us — something infinitely more significant than giving us the mango.
One thing is to say, “Let Thy Will be done.” But for how many hours, for how many seconds do I consciously offer that prayer to God? Early in the morning, when I get up, I say, “Let Thy Will be done.” Then again at night, before I retire, I say it. But if I say it only twice a day, it is not going to register in my conscious memory; whereas if I say it a few hundred times, it will register. If I turn the knob of the stove only to a certain extent, there will be no flame. But if I turn it a little more, and still more, then I will see the flame; the fire will start. Similarly, if I say, “Let Thy Will be done” only once or twice a day, nothing may happen; whereas if I do it many more times, then it is as if I am turning the knob to such an extent that there will be a flame.
Every day we do the same thing; we do this much. This is what we human beings do! But if it is necessary for us to go farther, we do not go that far. Our problem is that our effort is limited.
Every day I am ready to walk half a mile; then I am fully satisfied. But I am not getting the result that I need for my body. If I go one full mile, then I will see that there is a great difference between half a mile and one mile. Similarly, when we say, “Let Thy Will be done,” consciously we are doing it; but we do not do it many times during the day. If we can say it even twenty or thirty or forty times a day, it will help us tremendously. We do not have to repeat it 7,000 or 8,000 or 20,000 times — no, no! Let us try to do it even once every hour. Out of twelve hours, if we keep our mind alert and spend two or three minutes every hour to offer this prayer, then I feel that we will get better results.
Each time we pray we can do the same thing, but the number of times is also a factor. In India when we do japa, we repeat it 108 times or more. Again, some people do it thousands and thousands of times, but sometimes it may become mechanical. At that time there is no freshness, there is no newness, there is no joy in it. That we do not want. We do not want to go to that extreme. Some people recite a prayer or mantra like a parrot. But if we can do it soulfully, most soulfully quite a few times during the day, and if we can feel that our prayer is touching the very depths of our heart, then we are bound to get results.
“Let Thy Will be done” is one prayer. But if you have some other sacred or secret prayer, you can offer it. It does not have to be a prayer to God to cure your ailment, but it can be something special. You have a spiritual Master and you practise spirituality, so if you feel that you can do something inwardly, then kindly do that very thing. You have been praying for thirty or forty years, but you are not getting the result that you need or deserve. But I wish to say that you can do a little more, a little more.
If we are not getting the result of our prayer, we can do one of two things. One approach is to say that we need patience, like a farmer. He sows the seed, but he does not expect the bumper crop overnight. The seed has to germinate and become a plant. Another approach is that if we feel we are doing the right thing, then we have to do it more.
If I feel that I am doing something absolutely correct but I am not getting the result of my action, I can say that I am leaving the result at the Feet of God. I have done my duty; what I was supposed to do, I have done. Now I say, “Let Thy Will be done.” That is true. But again, I have to know to what extent I have done the right thing. If I have the capacity to continue a little more, a little further, then I should do it.
In your case, you have been doing your regular prayer, secretly, for a long time. But after you have finished your prayer, please do not add a desire to it. Just feel that you have pleased God. You may think that, since you have pleased God, God will do the needful. That is true. But there is nothing wrong in doing more!
I will see in my body if there is anything defective. The body, like the soul and the heart, has to become perfect; everything has to be perfect. Let us say that my knees are hurting. I am praying and praying to God, but I am not begging Him to cure my knees. After I have prayed, I feel I have pleased God.
In your case, after you pray, if you consciously see that something is not perfect in your body, you can just concentrate on that defective part, that imperfect limb of your body. There is nothing wrong in it! At that time you are not praying, but the cosmic energy you are drawing upon yourself. You are not begging God, “God, I have prayed for Your Victory for so many years. Can You not cure my ailment?” No, no; that is not the way. While praying to please God in His own Way, you can draw upon yourself some cosmic energy.
When I look at your eyes, when I look at your face, I see that you do draw this cosmic energy. This cosmic energy if you just apply, what is wrong in it? It is your own cosmic energy. If you have money, you can spend it. If you have some cosmic energy, and if you apply it to your physical problem, there is nothing wrong in it. You yourself have acquired it. You did not even pray to God for cosmic energy. You prayed to God to please Him in His own Way.
While praying, you are inundated with some spirit or energy — I call it cosmic energy. There is nothing wrong in applying that energy if you feel that something is not perfect in your body. That means you are curing yourself, let us say. I see that you do have the capacity. It will help you! That cosmic energy you are so often using for your creativity. Many, many times when I look at your picture, I see that cosmic energy. You are using the cosmic energy that you have got from your prayer and meditation. It is right in front of you, in front of your eyes and nose. I see it! Even when I looked at a picture of you when you were standing in an ordinary way, I saw all cosmic energy. This cosmic energy you are using for your creative life. But there is nothing wrong if you use it for something else also, because cosmic energy cures everything. This energy cures us of all imperfections.
You say that, while playing music, you surrender. But before you surrendered, either a few hours earlier or on the previous day, you did something. You thought of what you were going to play, or you concentrated and meditated on it. At that very moment, perhaps you did not pray or meditate or do anything special, but it was like opening a door. When you open a door, immediately light goes into the room. While you are playing, you have surrendered; you have asked God to play in and through you. But before asking God to play through you, if you have made no previous preparation, God is not going to do anything in and through you. While you are playing, because you have already done the preparation, you surrender everything to God’s Will. At that time God is acting in and through you. By virtue of your surrender, you are playing. But I am saying that, to come to that stage of surrender, you need preparation. We walk a certain distance and then, when we feel that we cannot go any farther, we say, “God, help me!” But if we do not do anything, if we just say to God, “I have surrendered,” that is called the surrender of the lazy.
In your case, you are not lazy! You are a seeker. You have a Master and you have prayed and meditated for so many years. From those good things that you have been doing for so many years, you have got the message of surrender. You have got the message “Let Thy Will be done” from your prayers and meditations for God knows how many years. After so many years of sincere effort, you are offering your surrender. Your surrender will be most effective because you have prayed, you have meditated; you are a seeker.
There are many who will try to say the same thing: “I surrender.” But what are they going to surrender? What have they done, first of all, to surrender? We have to do something to please God. Then we can say, “I surrender.” In our Bhagavad-Gita it is said that we must first do the work, and then surrender. Doing the work is the preparation, not the performance. At the time of your performance, you are surrendering. But if you had not done the preparation, you would not have got the message of surrender.
Again, with regard to your physical problem, I have said that when you pray and meditate you get some energy. This energy is not coming from the body. It is coming from outside, from above. Then, you can distribute it. If you see that one part of your body is not doing well, it is not functioning well, you can apply the energy that have acquired. You are not borrowing this energy from someone. You have pleased God by praying and meditating, and God has given you the capacity. God may not use it right away, in this particular spot, but you yourself can use it.
It is like father and child. The father has given money to the child, and the father says, “Now use it.” If the son feels like buying a piece of candy, he will buy it, because his father has given him the money. The son does not say, “My father has given me the money. Now, if it is his will, let him give me a piece of candy also.”
God says, “I gave you this wealth, and now I am telling you to use it!” But you do not use it, or you use it for something else. The thing that you feel you need most, as a child needs a piece of candy, you are not buying. You are buying something else, something else.
This is not advice that I am giving you! All this I am saying on the strength of my oneness, oneness, oneness, absolute oneness with your soul and with your heart. I am sincerely, most sincerely trying to do something for your physical problem. Now, when I say that there is something you can do on your part, in no way is it advice that I am giving. In a tug-of-war, if two persons are on one side and on the other side there is only one individual, there is every possibility that the two persons will pull harder and win the game. In the same way, you and I are pulling together.
Do you approve of my philosophy? You are a seeker, a great seeker! That is why we are in the same boat. I am a seeker and you are also a seeker. We are in the same boat.
I know for sure there is only one Master, the Inner Pilot. Others only guide us; they take us a few steps and then they have to surrender, because they are not the Inner Pilot.
There are two ways, they say: the monkey-way and the kitten-way. The baby monkey is usually holding on to the back of the mother monkey, while the kitten is hanging from the mother’s mouth; the mother is carrying it. The one that is held by the mother is safer than the one that is seated on the back of the mother.
It is the same with father and child. If the child is holding the father’s hand and then he sees something exciting, he may release his father’s hand and fall down. Then he gets hurt. But if the father has hold of the child, no matter what happens, even if something very exciting takes place, he will not let go of his child. Then the child is safe. The father sees what is going on and the child also sees. The child has the same experience, the same excitement, but he is safe, because his father is not going to let go of the child’s hand.
In the same way, if someone has greater capacity, and if that person holds on to a second person, that second person is safe. In the spiritual life, if there is somebody who can hold on to you, then you are safer than you would be if you were holding on to him.
Do you see the difference? Something exciting is going on. But if somebody else is there to hold on to you, then you can enjoy the same experience, but you are safe. The same excitement is going on, but there is no danger. The person who is holding on to you, if he has inner strength and inner joy, may or may not be excited himself, but he is not going to release you. Then, like the child, you are safe.
That is why we use the term “Inner Pilot.” We can be seated at His Feet, but if temptation arises, then we may disappear. But again, if He ties us to His Feet, then He will not allow anything to happen to us. If we want to welcome temptation, He says, “I am not going to allow you!” But if we just sit at His Feet, or at the feet of our Master, and something happens, we may just go away, because we are not tied. This tie we call protection.
You give me immense joy — immense! — in every sense of the term. Thank you.
HCE 4. Sri Chinmoy meditated with a dear friend who had a serious health problem. 22 February 2005, Annam Brahma Restaurant, Jamaica, New York↩