A seeker's conversation with his Inner Pilot1

A seeker's conversation with his Inner Pilot, his Beloved Lord, the Absolute Supreme:

My sweet Lord, the world disappoints me. The world fails me. How is it that I still love the world?

"My child, you love the world precisely because you see Me, Your Beloved Supreme, as preparation today; but tomorrow you will see Me as satisfaction. Inside the disappointment, inside the failure, you see only one thing and that is My own growth and evolution. Therefore, you love the world."

My Lord Supreme, I have tried to please You with love, devotion and surrender, but I have failed. If I start the journey all over again, that is to say, if I make friends with sloth and inertia on the physical plane, with aggression and impurity on the vital plane, with doubt and suspicion on the mental plane, and with insecurity and timidity on the psychic plane, do You think Your Compassion will then overflow for my sad failure? Do You think You will show me Your unconditional Compassion because of my most deplorable failure?

"No, My child, I shall not. Do not go back. Walk along the right road. It will eventually lead you to your destined goal. Even if you fail all the time to run, even if you fail to march, even if you fail to walk, even if you fail to crawl, even if, because of your lack of receptivity, you have to sleep on the road, do not go back, do not march backward. The goal is always ahead. If the world fails you, if the world disappoints you, if you feel that you have failed yourself, if you feel that you are totally lost, if you feel that you have disappointed Me, then I assure you, I shall grant you, time and again, chance after chance. Also, those who have failed you will be given countless opportunities to please the supreme Reality in you, as you will be granted countless opportunities to please the supreme Reality in them. Do not give up. Once you start walking along the road of spirituality, do not give up. Only give up one thing: expectation. For today's expectation becomes tomorrow's frustration, and the day after it is transformed into total destruction.

"Do not expect anything from the world. Do not expect anything from Me. Do not expect anything from yourself. Just dive deep within. Your very acceptance of the spiritual life, your very willingness to walk along the path, is more than enough satisfaction. There are millions and billions of people on earth who are not awakened and who do not feel the necessity to be awakened. You are awakened. This is more than enough. What else is needed will eventually be given: that is, illumination.

"My creation started with Vision. This Vision is bound to be followed by illumination and inside illumination what will loom large is satisfaction. Do not give up the spiritual life; only give up expectation-life if you really want satisfaction in every plane of your existence — the physical, vital, mental and psychic."

  1. WNY 35. St. John's University, Jamaica, NY — 28 April 1978, 7:30 p.m.